Why Is It So Difficult To Give A Compliment?
What is the cost-benefit ratio of giving a compliment?
Most people would no doubt agree that it’s pretty high.
Singing the praise of a friend, highlighting a good trait of a colleague or to simply say thank you for a good deed done.
The human need for appreciation is profound. That ‘feel good’ rush for the recipient is enormously underrated. One’s spirit is completely lifted as a result.
And what does it cost?
In real terms, nothing.
So why then is it so difficult?
As is often the case, the cause lies in our low self-esteem.
We incorrectly feel that by lifting someone else up we are putting ourselves down.
This is because we don’t love ourselves enough, and we often struggle with fulfilment in our own lives.
Instead of focusing on discovering our own paths, we try to imitate others as we desperately seek to fit in.
Unfortunately, many of us lack a strong intrinsic compass or sense of direction. We rate ourselves based on a comparison to others.
If life is a game of comparison, then it becomes a zero-sum game.
Any achievement of someone else would therefore cause one to feel more diminished as a result.
However, if we all work on achieving a healthier self-esteem and practicing genuine happiness in our lives, we can feel more comfortable, and perhaps even eager to praise others.
In truth it is a win-win. By complimenting others, we are making them feel good, and consequently they will pass on praise to others.
A ripple effect is created. It could spread quickly.
This could even be a game changer in our homes, workplaces, or community.
Very little cost. Huge benefit.
It could even change the world.